There is a known day-to-day struggle in perfecting a relationship. Learning the do’s and don’t’s, the likes and dislikes. It may feel like schooling sometimes. I’ve come to realize that men, likes a woman who will understand them. Most men, when angry, likes to stay away just to cool their heads and we women loves to resolve situations right away. Some of us will be cordial while others very boisterous. Whatever the method, let it be known that it is better to let them walk away, cool their heads and then return to solve the situation. It’s more difficult than it sounds but I am telling you it will make things easier in the relationship.
For example my fiancée and I got into it recently and boy oh boy, I was hurting. I’m sure you ladies know how an angry man is. Careless!!! That’s my definition. At first my womanly traits were acting up and I was trying to resolve the issue but realize I couldn’t. So I stayed away, giving him that breathing space. The next morning I forgot the issue and was moving about as normal. When I first approached him, he was defensive because he thought I was coming back with the issue. However he was wrong. I based my questions on the days events and the politely asked him to go with me to the market. He didn’t answer but pulled me into his muscular arms which is another way of saying things are fine. I was not gullible to that gesture at all and continued to be polite but stern. Before we left the house I pecked him on the lips and didn’t utter a word. That was the honey to catch the fly. Through it all, I was not smiling but my face said, “I love you but you hurt me badly last night”. Oh yes, he was being macho and didn’t smile either but gave me the passive behaviour. Eventually we sat down to grab some breakfast which I wilfully sponsored and there it came from him.. “Babe I am really sorry about last night. Didnt mean to act like that.” My respond was ok without a smile. I saw it in his eyes, my response pierced him like a knife. So he started free styling songs to me above his love in the most humourous way. Again I gave a slight smile. Well that led to 4 pairs of earrings and fruits for the week. 🙂 By the time we got home, he embraced me and apologised again. That’s when I smiled entirely. Later that day, he dressed me up and took me to dinner.
Ladies, this may not be the exact way in which your situation resolve but try understanding your man’s behavioural patterns and see what works best for you. I guarantee, when they’re mad and you add a lil sweetness bit by bit, they will come around. NB: Don’t try to throw all the sweetness on them all at once. That’s a disaster waiting to happen. 🙂
Be Blessed! Love you all – Candace
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