Hi Family, it feels good to be back. I’ve been missing in action for a while and you can only imagine the level of testing I was facing to the point that I could not blog. As I type, all my countenance can wear is a smile because my heart is elated and filled with joy that God continues to show up and off. Reminding me that he is there and will never leave me even when I can’t feel him because the oppression becomes so thick.
Something that I feel led to share with you is one of the many things I have learned since my hiatus from blogging and as the title states, “Forgiven but not accepted”. Confused? Don’t worry, it will be crystal clear by the time I’m through. Amidst the testing God has been blessing me beyond my mind can ever comprehend. So I guess you are then wondering, why was I so low to the point that I could not post online because for writing, I was still doing it but as my prayer, since there were many occasions, I could not open my mouth to say Father help. Only the tears were able to flow from me. The title is the answer. I did not accept my forgiveness. Something that many of us do, sometimes without recognizing it, even as I did for days, weeks and months. From the day I said a meaningful sorry and repented before God for the many mistakes I made when I backslided, he forgave me. That was two years ago and for those two years, would you believe I was still carrying my baggage? Waow. I must be related to Hercules because I was carrying the world on my shoulder (lol). Seriously though, through God pointed that out to me, that though I was forgiven, I never accepted and received my forgiveness. So upon the receipt of my blessings, I would go into question and scrutiny mode, waiting for it to fail or combust right before my eyes. Why? Because to me, I was not worthy of anything good. I did this and I did that and I failed God and I hurt God and I and I and I and I. If you ask me, that is sure many I’s also known as self or flesh. Something that we are mandated to put to death once we receive Christ. The one thing that the enemy holds unto to condemn the saints of God. Romans 8:1 could not say it any better. There is no condemnation for me if I walk after the Spirit, which is what I am suppose to be doing if Christ is in control.
Who says I don’t deserve anything good? I am now a new creature since old things are passed away and all things became new in Christ – 2 Corinthians 5:17. God has great plans for me and it is never to hurt me – Jeremiah 29:11. When God said it was over, it was over and the end of the bad road is what we all need to accept. Those days are over. The past is the past. Just like me, you are forgiven. It’s time to fully receive it. Full acceptance of forgiveness, brings full recovery because the past will be unable to haunt you. I thank God for his forgiveness and for loving me. I thank God most of all that I have fully received it and will not question when he pours out his blessings on me, even if it seems to big and good to be true. That’s just the kind of God we serve. His blessings will sometimes be extreme. As a royal priesthood, what kind of gifts do you expect to receive? Think about it.
Have you fully accepted your forgiveness? I hope so. If you have not, then wait no more. Ask God to forgive for doubting him and tap into your forgiveness. He loves you to that very point. It is an awesome feeling to be free. Thank you Jesus for setting me FREE from my sins. Thank you Jesus for liberty.