Reality Check


Circumstances often shows us the reality of our stance. Especially in the life of a Christian, the truth of what we believe, is made known to us through testing times. I remember a couple years ago, when I  began facing situations of a new dimension, a very soft voice spoke to me, posing a question that is still engraved in my mental membrane to this day. I was asked, “Will you be a good time Christian or an all time Christian“?

At the time, I vehemently responded without thinking about my answer “I will be an all time Christian”. The profoundness of the question did not yet fully penetrate my mental faculty and so it was easy to respond. After all, I was responding to God. The one man I will say or do anything to please. What I needed to be mindful of was, I was replying to a God who knows and sees all things. (TIP: Be careful how you answer God, your words might just squelch you).

As time went on and the waves of life began beating against my ship, slowly the infrastructure began to fall apart. The response I gave then became a question. Will I be an all time Christian? I was just about ready to give up. Many days I wallowed in sorrow and anguish. The truth about my foundation was coming to life. How solid was I in Christ? Were my circumstances going to determine the basis of my relationship with him?

There were days it almost did. I am not sure what kept me going. I will have to say, it was God himself in a very strange way because my mind said let go. My body said let go. I believe my heart said let go but yet I found myself holding on and moving on. I marvel at it to this day but in all this I was given a reality check. 

I was left with an evaluation sheet for my life, especially my faith and I must admit, I found myself wanting in some areas. Never did I thought, that I would be thankful for the grueling processing I went through and is still overcoming. Now I know what it means when the scripture says “In everything give thanks”. It may not make sense initially. What about pain makes sense? All we think about is getting it away. If there was a pill for emotional and societal pains, I am sure it would have peaked sales on the market because no one likes to feel the effects of circumstances. However, if there is no testing, there will be no reshaping. There were much improvement to be made in my life and I am thankful for failures and disappointements because they helped in bringing about the readjustment.

By much pruning and purging, it is safe to say, I conscientiously choose to be an all time Christian. God will not be served because he can serve me but simply because he is God and deserves to be revered. Don’t seek God for the things (blessings) but seek him to know his heart. We often don’t realize this is where we truly are until faced with many disappointments. When we find ourselves in a solidified disposition, we simultaneously find it difficult to be moved, even when faced with circumstances.

Have you had a reality check lately? What did you discover about your life (especially in Christ)?

– Candace Cudjoe

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2 thoughts on “Reality Check

  1. This really spoke to me. Ughhh. One of those gentle tongue lashes or that look from your daddy sitting in the pulpit. Kinda like, “once you know better, you do better”. That’s the way I see it with Christians. We can’t know the way/the truth and NOT follow it. It doesn’t make sense, it’s frustrating and its designed to get your attention. The more I read books about egoic consciousness and letting go, it all makes sense and really relates to this post. We have to have something of consistency in our lives. It is already there, all we need to do is acknowledge it. Some people call it God, energy, some call it the silence or the expanse But whatever you call it, it is there, it is constant. Wouldn’t it be best and most productive to find a way to live in a way that in always in tandem with this force instead of against it? I am slowly but surely learning this lesson. Letting go has been the most challenging thing in my life, letting go of control, perfectionism, and self-hate. I am determined to live the life I was destined to live and become molded into the woman I am meant to be via non resistance or surrendering. There have been quite a few notable people who did much for humanity by way of non resistance: Martin Luther King, Jr., Nelson Mandela, Gandhi, Mother Teresa…..I can go on.
    Thank you, lovely lady for this piece. Your soul seems so delicate and fragrant, like a flower. Just a faint whiff of it. I smell. And follow like bees, through trees, just trying to see, what could be, this wonderful thing to me.
    In love and light,
    Ron G
    (Sunkissed flower Child)

    • Thank you very much for opening your heart to receive. Being translucent (in most part) is not easy but that’s what God requires of me. So it’s always a blessing to touch the heart of someone. Love and appreciation to the utmost.

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