Leadership: Leader, Don’t Take Yourself So Seriously

When I was in corporate America, my company’s leaders would use fear as an incentive to get the young consultants to work hard. I had attended an orientation session with the top graduates from Harvard, Stanford, Cornell, and MIT, which meant I was surrounded by people who were used to succeeding. The pressure to perform and the pressure to outperform myself stressed me out. I couldn’t understand why being successful was so important, yet I worked hard to achieve success in my work because I constantly feared failure.

But when God took over my life, something dramatic took place. I still worked hard, but not because I believed my human flesh could attain perfection. I worked hard as my humble act of service for a God who is perfect, knowing that He has already covered my imperfections. My freedom came from reading Romans 3:22-24: “This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” Did you hear that? We all sin. We all fall short of God’s glory. These verses took me from the arrogance of thinking that I could do anything perfectly to realizing that only God is perfect. In fact, I learned that if I could accept my imperfections I could relax and not put unrealistic demands on myself.

Psalm 103:15-16 helped me to take myself less seriously. It reads, “As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower in the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.” When I ask myself, “What will this matter a hundred years from now?” I find myself letting go of details that used to send me into a tailspin. The fact is that when I am gone, the world will remember me no more. The only thing that matters is that I have done my best to leave God’s fingerprints behind me.

One of the greatest truths that helped set me free is found in Romans 8:3-4: “For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the Spirit.”

What these verses teach us is that God’s Son was the only one who was able to fulfill the perfect requirements of God’s law. God is the only one who has succeeded in everything. Jesus lived a perfectly holy life and then went to the cross to pay the price for our imperfections. He then offers us the gift of forgiveness for those same imperfections. More than that, He gives us the opportunity to fully meet God’s standards “according to the Spirit.” We live the full requirements of God according to the Spirit by admitting that in our human flesh we cannot attain perfection. The only way we can be perfect is by simply receiving Christ’s perfection. Then by faith, we allow God to live His perfect life through us.

So how do we live our lives by the power of Christ’s perfection? First, we no longer try to be impressive. We acknowledge that we have missed the standard. We then accept the gift of Christ’s perfection and know that He has all the answers. We ask God to show us His answers, and we get out of the way by not arguing with Him. Instead, we offer our lives as a living sacrifice and say to God, “All my energy belongs to You. All my creativity belongs to You. All my diligence belongs to You. Use them as You will, and direct me to solve this problem or reach this goal.” Are you so focused on successfully completing your goals by your own power that you have overwhelmed yourself? Perhaps it’s time to focus on the perfection of Christ and then trust Him to show you day by day how to reach His goals.

The key to releasing your fear of failure is to give God your life as an act of worship and let Him control the results. If you have given God your best, then rest in knowing He is pleased with you. At the end of the day, He is the only person you work for. You exist to fulfill His purposes, not anyone else’s. Colossians 3:23-24 teaches us, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.”

Leadership: Leadership Is Relationship

During college, Rachel Quan’s spiritual journey was shaped by the book Celebration of Discipline, Richard J. Foster’s formative work on the spiritual life. Today Quan serves Renovaré USA—founded by Foster in 1988—as its executive director, bringing with her a wealth of experience from a rich career in church, parachurch, nonprofit, and business leadership. GFL recently spoke with Quan about leadership, spiritual formation, and her Wonderdog, Brooks.

Rachel, tell us about the work of Renovaré (a Latin word meaning “to renew”) and the role you play there.

Richard Foster, Dallas Willard, Marti Ensign, Roger Fredrikson, Bill Vaswig, James Bryan Smith, and others had a vision for spiritual renewal and lifelong discipleship to Jesus, and they helped to form the ministry. We believe that the Kingdom of God is here and now and that the abundant life Jesus promised is available to everyone and anyone. We aren’t just waiting for our abundant life in heaven. We can really live into that abundant life now. Our passion as a ministry is helping people become more like Jesus. People who desire to become more like Jesus have an impact on the world they live in.

“Executive director” is just a fancy title for doing whatever it is that needs to be done to continue to promote the vision and mission of the ministry. I see my key role as one of team builder—bringing the team together that takes the message with them wherever they go. We have an incredible board, ministry team, and staff who write, speak, and share the work. They are from all walks of life, different denominational traditions, and various ages. We aren’t about one personality doing all of the writing and speaking. Richard was the one who started this—always bringing along new leadership with him wherever Renovaré was invited. We continue that to this day.

How did God gift and prepare you for your work with Renovaré?

First of all, I have had incredible mentors and friends in ministry and the marketplace, who have loved me enough to encourage the gifts they’ve seen in me, or have held me accountable for the areas I’ve needed to grow in. And I have to say that failure was one of the key components to preparing me for the work of ministry. The difficult part about failure is often the ache in my soul as I’ve learned lessons the hard way. The best part about failure has been what I’ve learned and hopefully applied. Another positive aspect has become the folks I mentioned earlier—who walked with me and loved me in spite of my failures. Those relationships continue to this day. I don’t think I’ll ever “arrive” as far as being fully prepared for my work. I’m consistently learning, growing, and making course corrections.

I will say that I feel like my history of working both in ministry and in the marketplace have been gifts given to me. Experiencing and leading in both of these worlds has been important and I’ve drawn a lot on those experiences. Whether I’ve been in official “ministry” or in the marketplace, I’ve always led from my relationship with Christ (sometimes well and sometimes not so well). There is often a misperception out there that somehow there’s a distinction between the spiritual leader and the business leader. One is always a spiritual leader no matter the setting, and that’s been important for me to remember and apply. It’s also important for me to communicate that to others. Being a lifelong disciple of Jesus doesn’t entail living our lives in silos—“now this is my spiritual life and over here is my work life.” All of it is spiritual. I am grateful for the myriad of people in my life who have fostered this view in me.

Rachel, you’ve mentioned the importance of relationships in achieving goals and accomplishing objectives. Say some more about this.

Life is all about relationship. And I would venture to say we can’t accomplish much without one another. One of my mentors early in life was a pastor named Vicky Jones. She once told me that a good leader was often seen behind the scenes, encouraging the gift of leadership in others, discipling them in their gifts, and putting them up front. Her exact words on this particular topic were, “The less people see of you up front, the better.” She didn’t mean I didn’t sometimes have a role to play by speaking or leading up front. Sometimes that’s needed. But if I am able to see in others their God-given gifts and encourage them to use them in the ministry, I am multiplying the ministry’s effect. The ministry doesn’t just stay with me. It doesn’t even depend on just me. Oftentimes the danger of being personality-driven is that when that person is no longer around, the message is gone with them.

So my job is to find as many people as I can, build relationships with them, and encourage them in their gifts. And, boy, getting to see the multiplying effect in that regard is such a gift for me! There was a small group of women I invested in early in my leadership days—about 14 years ago. I poured as much as I could into them and am blown away by what I see some of them doing today.

Relationship really is everything. I had a saying with one of my old marketplace partners, Brent Walla: “Honor relationship first and God will take care of the rest.” That was our philosophy in business and it was very true. It’s still my philosophy in ministry. When we honor relationship first, God really does take care of all of the things we need.

How is it that you lead others in the process of spiritual formation?

Wow. That’s quite a daunting thing to think about. This goes back to the whole leadership and relationship question. Spiritual formation isn’t about “leadership” in the top-down sense of the word. Dallas Willard liked to say that spiritual formation is about living our lives today as if Jesus were living our lives. And Jesus wasn’t top-down in his approach. He just genuinely lived life with people and loved people and walked with people. My hope is that that is what I am doing. I am sure some days I am better at this than other days.

Why is spiritual formation so important in the life of a leader?

I just got to spend some significant time with Bob and Alice Fryling recently, and Bob and I had a lot of conversation about this. His book on spiritual formation and leadership, The Leadership Ellipse, was something I studied with a small group last year. The book and just knowing Bob have been such encouragements when it comes to understanding spiritual formation in the life of a leader.

Spiritual formation for leaders is everything. If our inner and outer lives aren’t in sync, I truly believe we are not able to be good leaders. If our own souls are not being taken care of, we start to run on our own strength, out of our own ego’s needs. I’ve been there. And some days I revert back to that when I have failed to care for my own soul, when I’ve ignored my own formation. The joke in my house (which is not really a joke) is that if I am going to lead an organization that is all about the balanced, with-God life, then perhaps I ought to have one. And the Renovaré board and ministry team are consistently calling me to pay attention to this. I’m grateful for their promptings, and for the room they give me to ensure that my inner life is taken care of so that I can be an effective leader for the ministry.

However, it’s more than just about the ministry. I cannot be a good friend, daughter, wife, or mother without having my inner life and outer life in sync. I might be the leader of a ministry, but far greater is the impact I have with the people I live life intimately with. They’re the ones who can really tell you whether I’m leaning into my relationship with Jesus or not.

And I think the question on a lot of readers’ minds is this: Who is Brooks, and what makes her a “wonder-dog”?

Pets are good for the soul! Our “Wonder-dog” was found eating rocks from a dumpster on a movie set in Louisiana. She was just a puppy and so skinny you could see all of her ribs. The crew from the movie (my sister among them) adopted her, paid for her first round of shots, and gave her her own dressing room on the movie set. Brooks is a real-life example to us of our own redemption, and we marvel and wonder at that. Something about knowing where and how she was found and how great her life is now inspires everyone in our little family. So that’s why we call her the “wonder-dog!”
Margot Starbuck is a frequent contributor and editorial advisor to Gifted for Leadership, an author, a speaker, and a volunteer among friends with disabilities. Her most recent book is Permission Granted: And Other Thoughts on Living Graciously among Sinners and Saints.

 

More at www.MargotStarbuck.com.